


Don't Go

by Aria_Lerendeair



Series: Prompt Spree Fanfiction [11]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gabriel brought back to life, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sam's mind playing tricks on him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-13
Updated: 2014-03-13
Packaged: 2018-01-15 13:53:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1307191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria_Lerendeair/pseuds/Aria_Lerendeair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by art by the amazing Drawsshits.  Sam is hallucinating Gabriel in front of him.  He knows that, Gabriel even tells him that.  But maybe...if he wishes hard enough?  He'll get what he wants....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Go

**Author's Note:**

> Here is where you can find the drawing that demanded I write a fic for it. 
> 
> http://drawsshits.tumblr.com/post/55479020772/shade-shad-noun-1-a-comparative-darkness-or
> 
> The art is amazing, I highly recommend checking out ALL of her stuff. <3 But yeah. I saw this on my dash and just....had to write it.

  
  
  
  
Sam dropped his head into his hands, pressing the heel of his palm into his eyes, rubbing at them.  No more crying.  It wasn’t worth it.  Dean would never understand his frustrations and why he was still angry.  It hurt, and dammit, was it so bad that he wanted his brother to apologize and promise that he wouldn’t do anything like this again?

  
Was it so bad that he wanted Dean to not sacrifice himself every time something happened to them?  Or that Dean kept an angel possessing him a secret?  More secrets more pain.  Sam growled into his hands, tears creeping past his eyes and into his hands.  

  
"Hey Kiddo."  

  
Sam dropped his hands away, the rest of his body freezing in place.  He knew that voice.  He knew it because it haunted his dreams.  His chest ached.  What if he looked up and it was his imagination again?  If he was just doing more wishful thinking?  What would Dean think if he knew he imagined Gabriel appearing one day and wrapping him in his arms?  He had to make sure.  

  
He looked up and stared.  Gabriel.  In green jacket and red shirt.  Golden eyes shining.  Sam felt his heart leap into his throat and cleared his throat.  ”Gabriel?”  

_  
PleaseberealpleaseberealpleasepleasepleasehaveplayedatrickpleaseohgodGabrielplease._

  
Gabriel gave a small smile.  ”The one and only.”  

  
Sam bit down the noise that wanted to break free from his throat.  Gabriel’s hands reached out for him and hovered just above his hair.  He couldn’t feel anything, and yet Gabriel was close enough that he should feel his touch, feel something.  A sob threatened to break free. 

  
"You’re…"  Sam reached out and rested his hand on top of Gabriel’s arm, where he should feel clothing and muscle and bone.  There was nothing.  The image of the clothing reacted as though he had gripped it, crinkling around his hand, but he was holding onto nothing.  "You’re not real."  He whispered, the words sounding pathetic.  He wanted Gabriel to be real more than almost anything else.  

  
"Sorry Sammy."  

  
Sam couldn’t look away from Gabriel’s eyes, from how apologetic those golden eyes looked.  Like they wished they could be.  He swallowed around the lump in his throat.  How pathetic was he?  He was taking comfort in a shadow, a shade of the real Gabriel.  ”Please…”  Sam choked on the word, tears threatening even more.  ”Don’t leave me.”  Just for now.  He needed to pretend.  

  
He leaned forward and pressed his head to where there would have been a jacket, a shirt, and maybe a warm chest.  Gabriel would have been heavy, too heavy to be human, just like Cas.  An impossible being contained within such a small vessel.  If he imagined it hard enough, he could almost feel it, just like he could almost feel Gabriel’s fingers threading through his hair.  

  
"I won’t."  

  
The words were devastating and a sob escaped him before he could stop it.  Sam tried to keep them still, but his fingers flexed and the image in his hands wavered.   _Nonononononopleasenoplease_.

  
"Not this time."  

  
Sam felt the tears now, running down his cheeks and through Gabriel’s hands, his shoulders shaking.  He closed his eyes so he wouldn’t have to watch the image of Gabriel fade away.  He didn’t even know how Gabriel died for him, only that he had.  His hands tightened into fists and he knew the image was gone, a fragment of his fractured mind, like so many other things.  

  
“ _Gabriel_.”  

  
He didn’t care if he was weak.  For once, just once, he wanted to not be the strong one.  He wanted someone to hold him, to wrap their arms around him and hold on tight.  ”Dammit Gabriel, you said you wouldn’t.”  Sam whispered, keeping his eyes firmly clenched shut.  Silence echoed around him.  He bit down on his lip.  ”Gabriel.  You said you wouldn’t.  Please.”  

  
"Sammy?"  

  
His eyes snapped open and went to Gabriel, standing a few feet in front of him, golden eyes wide in shock.  ”Gabriel?”  

  
"Sam, whatever you were doing, don’t stop."  Gabriel demanded, looking down at his arms.  

  
Sam immediately shut his eyes and focused again.  Gabriel, his hands cupping his face, they’d be so warm, burning with Grace.  

  
"Keep going kid.  Whatever you’re doing, it’s working."  

  
Sam could hear Gabriel’s voice echoing in the room.  It wasn’t just in his mind.  His heart leapt in his chest.  Please. He hadn’t asked for anything, and he’d given so much.  Could he just have this?  Please?  Have him?  Have Gabriel?  

  
"Come on Sam.  You’re almost there."  

  
He opened his eyes again and stared at Gabriel, at the form that looked too real to possibly be true.  He almost felt like he did when he was drinking demon’s blood.  Powerful.  Gabriel’s image suddenly flickered.  

  
"Sam!!"  

  
The desperation in Gabriel’s voice made Sam’s attention snap fully back to the angel.  He stood up and crossed the distance between them in two steps.  What he could feel, that power, he focused all of it on Gabriel, on pulling him back, pulling him in.  Gabriel’s image wavered once more before solidifying again.  

  
Sam reached out, his hand hovering over Gabriel’s arm.  He couldn’t look away from the angel’s eyes.  They were begging, pleading with him.  A leap of faith.  He had to take it.  He dropped his hands to Gabriel’s forearms and yanked the angel against him.  Gabriel was warm.  Warm, solid and real.  

  
"Gabriel."  

  
"Always surprising me, aren’t you kiddo?"  

  
Sam wanted to ask what happened.  What he had managed to do and why Gabriel was real, almost heavy in his arms.  But nothing was more important than holding Gabriel as close as he could get him.  He pressed his face against that honey brown hair and inhaled, the scent of candy canes making him laugh.  ”Of course you smell like candy.” 

  
Gabriel’s answering laugh was the best thing Sam had heard in years.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hate it? Love it? Did I have someone remove their shirt twice? Let me know!
> 
> Comments and Criticisms welcome!
> 
> You can find me here: http://aria-lerendeair.tumblr.com/
> 
> You can also watch me write fics like this (and dozens of others) live! Follow me on Livestream for fics, shenanigans and a general all-around awesome time! http://new.livestream.com/accounts/7212317


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